Avoidance Technique
Before Easter, Good Friday. Before joy, suffering.
Until this last year, I have viewed suffering as something to be avoided. I have tried to avoid suffering, yet I suffer. And still, I find myself trying to avoid it.
Some of my suffering is the result of my own bad choices and sin. Some of my suffering is caused by events beyond my control. My solution, though, is usually the same - try to avoid suffering.
I have tried looking for the right formula. Maybe more prayer, or bible reading; or watching television, or exercising. Yet, all of these things, many of them good in and of themselves, are aimed at relieving the symptoms of suffering - hopelessness, depression, judgementalism, and generally just being too hard on myself and others. They do nothing to stem the suffering itself.
I am seeing, though dimly, another way. The way of embracing my suffering. And, when possible, offering my suffering up to God.
Release versus relief. Release of God's Spirit in my life. This is risky, as I have to lay down my shovel and stop digging my own cisterns. As I quit digging my own cisterns, and become still, I may be putting myself in a position to recognize the soft breeze of God's Spirit, blowing and moving when and where it wants. For God's purposes, not mine.
Suffering messes up my perspective. If I continue to view it in the wrong light, I will continue to be too introspective, too self-absorbed. It puts me in the position of feeling I am at the center of the universe, instead of seeing myself on the receiving end of God's grace and loving-kindness.
posted by Anamchara @ 5:12 AM
0 comments
